You Can Do It

This phrase is an oft-heard one, but how often do we use it on ourselves? Be it in educational institutions or in the workplace, it is a sad fact but true - that negativity in the leaders breeds even more negativity in their followers. Read the middle part of Mr Wang's post on this. Can you imagine how the promising young man that is now would have turned out if he actually believed his teacher?

That said, we must beware the danger of overusing this sentence without meaning it, because we, being the smart people we are, can easily differentiate between heartfelt words and words that are said out of routine/without meaning them.

I have seen and heard so many people who tell you not to dream big. They use their age to impress upon me that, despite all my "potential", I better be pragmatic. A big house, a sports car? Stop dreaming. A millionaire before 30? Stop dreaming. The inevitable answer to "I think I have a great idea to make money" would be "if so, why didn't the thousands and millions of people before you not think about it?" Better have your two feet firmly on the ground, stop building castles in the air. All too familiar? I think it's in the Singaporean culture to be "practical".

Yes, Practicality and pragmatism are something we should be aware of. Parents should let their sons and daughters know how to be practical in life, yet should never try to suppress their youthful zest for life. It would be the greatest tragedy to bring up your offspring and have them think they can NEVER reach the top of the world, even in their wildest dreams. Is it wrong to dare to dream? To be the greatest musician that ever lived, to be the fastest person alive, to be the multi-talented person whom everyone admires, to be the most patient person in the world, to be the best teacher, to be the Prime Minister, to be whatever you want. You could even dream of being Superman, just so long as you have a firm vision of going about it. No one can ever stop you, it's all in your mind whether you can conquer that wall, get past that obstacle in life, whether you can pass the test, whether you can forget your old flame who left you for another.

It's all too tempting to tell someone to know their limits. Granted we have their good at heart, we don't want them to dream too high and fall down even harder. We don't want them to be left disappointed, disillusioned with the world, have their hopes smashed and dashed when they realize they're not up to par. But thing is, we have to admit we will never know how things will turn out. How do you know the classmate beside you who's always failing his maths test won't one day "wake up" and get the next PhD in maths? There're all too many cases of no-hopers made good to ignore.

Autistic people who are normally seen as mentally retarded, all have their own strengths. Kim Peek, whom doctors gave till 14 to survive, is 54 now and is known all over the world as the "living Google". He has the amazing ability to devour books 2 pages at a time, his left eye reading one page and his right eye the other - all of that simulataneously - and can read up to 8 books a day. He is able to store 80% of this information in his brain, hence his nick "The Living Google". (His life has been made into a movie, The Rain Man.) Albert Einstein, Thomas Edison, Jane Austen, Henry Ford, Van Gogh and even Bill Gates have all been known to be autistic. How many more examples of supposed "no-hopers" do you need to tell you that dreams are worth dreaming?

You know yourself best. Don't let people dictate your fate. Others may think that to live peacefully on Earth and minding their own business is the way in life. My own mother believes that suffering IS NECESSARY when we're living on Earth (in some ways it is true). But for the most part, I beg to differ. I have my own set of thinking, and I have included positivity as a way of life. I find that more often than not, I wake up feeling happy, and friends always admire my happy-go-lucky attitude. But that is something they too can control! And being happy-go-lucky doesn't make me any worse than them - I'm aware of being pragmatic too (notice I don't use "knowing my limits" - even autistic people can reach so high, why not me, an able-bodied person?). But that does not preclude me from dreaming my own dreams (and smiling that wry knowing smile that gets people puzzled.)

From Mr Wang's post: "Although I believe that most people can achieve great things, I also believe that most people won't. The greatest reason is that THEY don't believe that they themselves can achieve great things."

How apt. If you tell yourself you can't do it, you WILL NOT make it. If that lucrative bank job is still open, who is there to tell you you should not apply for it cos you're not good enough? Heck, give it a go, it won't waste a bit more than a few hours of your time, and at worst end up with a bruised ego. You at least have a chance of getting that job, better than that good-for-nothing who has ZERO chance.

The next time you want to tell someone to "forget it" and "stop dreaming", stop yourself. You might be looking at the next world champion or the world's next richest man/woman.


Related posts/blogs:
Trybe blog
Mr Wang's post